My dad cheated on my mom when I was little I remember the incident like it was yesterday. I was about 5 years old playing on the porch with some trucks ( yeah I was not a fan of dolls) and the phone rang. My mom answered it and all I heard was “you are who” then she sat down then she got up then she got mad…..when my mom get’s mad that is not a good thing. I remember her calling my grandma to come over to get me and my grandma told me to go upstairs to take a nap I slept for at least 2 hours when I got up my mom was still on the phone. She got off and went into her bedroom and started putting my dads clothes in the suitcase and started lining them up on the porch. She walked past me and her only words were when your dad comes home tell him goodbye cause you will never see him again.
At the time I did not know she was talking to my dads mistress. See my dad use to drive trucks out of town he had been a truck driver for years and was in the beginning stages of starting his own trucking company. My dads mistress called her because somehow she found my moms number in my dads belongings. The mistress had no idea my dad was married and she lived here in GA my dad had two double lives. My mom later told me she was upset not just because he cheated but he got the mistress pregnant. My mother told me at the age of 10 to never trust a man never they are men and they will always be men. You give them your heart and they will break it if you do marry don’t give them your whole heart that way if they break it you will still have some piece of it left.
I never longed for a dad because my friends didn’t have any so I did not feel I missed out on anything. I did not see my dad until I was around 22 he showed up and said his mother said he should come see about me at the time I was away at college so my mom said give me your number and if she wants to call she will. My mom gave me the number and I called because I wanted to know why it took so long for him to come and see me. We talked but it was awkward. He was married and had a son he told me I had 2 brothers. One from the mistress and one from his current wife. I never connected with him but I am from a small town so people who know my dad would tell me stories of how he took care of his step children but could care less about his real kids.
I remember a few years ago I desperately needed help the hubs and I did not have money and we were barely staying afloat. I broke down and called my dad to ask him to get me a cheaper car note…(my car note was close to 500 bucks and it was the only car we had and we needed a car) he had good credit I was willing to pay him monthly for a cheaper car if he could get the car in his name so we could free up some money. He told me “Oh I have an old car in my junk yard you can have it. It doesn’t have any heat or air but it runs”…yet he bought his step children a brand new car cash. I was livid and from then on I never spoke to him again.
I know this post is long but I wanted to give you a piece of my life there is more to that story and there is some hurt and anger at least on my end but these days I am thankful for my hubs. He may not be the best husband but he is an excellent father. My kids light up with joy when they see him. If you have have a good father cherish him and wish him a very happy fathers day.
I’m so sorry Kita. That must be difficult knowing you have a father out there but never had the chance to get close because he chose not to. So sorry ~hugs~ Thank you for sharing though. I love to hear about the “personal” side of people. Our past truly makes us what we are today. Kudos to your hubs. He seems to be a pretty stand up gentleman!
Such a hard story. I’m sorry that you never really got close to him, but I can understand your anger. Regardless of what you dad have done, your children are lucky to have your husband in their lives.
I agree, that sometimes our husbands may not always do the best of things, but no one can deny the fact that they do their damn best at fatherhood.
Wishing your husband and a family a happy father’s day.
That was great to share. I’m sure it helps to get it off your chest. Sorry that your dad wasn’t there.
Happy Father’s Day to your hubby as well!!!
I’m sorry Kita. That couldn’t have been easy to get off your chest. Thank you for sharing.
Enjoy Father’s Day with your husband and be thankful that you’re able to give your kids something you didn’t have.
Kita, I’m so sorry to hear that. I don’t understand how guys just walkout and leave their kids behind. You and your husband continue to make the path brighter for your own kids. Let them know no matter what, both of you guys will be there.
Hugs and Mocha,
Stesha
I know that had to be difficult to share. That’s one of the things I like about you. You’re real and you’re willinging to be open about your life. This is a very hard situation for you I’m sure especially with fathers day coming up. My girls dad isn’t in their life and I feel so bad that they have to go through this and I know it will effect them later in life. The kids are always the one to suffer.
Thanks for sharing this Kita..so many of us experience fathers who leave us…it helps to make peace along the way…and what a blessing your husband is an awesome father to your babies!
He sucks and you’re awesome..It’s hard to forgive sometimes!
In sorry Kita. But it’s his loss, not yours!
Thanks for sharing this personal story. You know by sharing this story I am sure you helped someone else who is or has gone through the same thing.
So glad you husband is a great father.
Thanks for sharing. I’m so sorry. This situation happens so often. It’s a shame. My bff has a VERY similar story. Appreciate you always being so transparent.
How brave of you to share this story with us. It is a difficult situation but God protects us!
I’m sorry about your relationship with your dad, but this is exactly the kind of relationship my girls are going to have with their biological father (I hate the term baby’s daddy). We haven’t seen him in over 6 years and they haven’t spoken to him in 3. I’ve decided to let them form their own opinion about their father. I can honestly say I don’t speak ill to them about him, although I’ve been tempted to many, many times. Thank you so much for sharing….
I didn’t mind the length and you could’ve written more if you wanted to. That was an important story you shared.
My kids father is not in their lives, he doesn’t make the slightest bit of effort to see them, and he never even met our daughter, and the he spent with our son was very limited.
It really does take a real man to be a dad. It’s nice that your husband has been there, and I hope you all had a great holiday
Thank you for sharing your story. I am so happy foir you, that your children were blessed with a wonderful father.
Mrs. Delightful
http://www.ourdelightfulhome.blogspot.com
Glad you chose to share this. I didn’t think about my Father on Father’s Day until my sister made me talk to him. I still haven’t forgiven him for having another wive while he was married to my mom and having 3 other kids.
I’m sorry your dad was not there for you. I hope by sharing your story it helped you to release a lot of emotions. My dad remarried right after my mom passed away. It was hard at first, but now I have a caring stepmom and 2 brothers. My dad passed away in 2005. I am thankful that I was able to get over the hurt and maintain our relationship. Maybe one day your dad will come around and be there for you. He is missing out on so much by not being in your life. I’m sure your children would love to spend time with their grandfather. Take care Kita! : )